chewy chunky blondies - trying to satisfy all parties is impossible

So, do you think my boyfriend was happy after I stole half of his batch of chocolate chip cookies to give to my relatives in California? Hmm, not so much. What about when I told him I was baking another batch of cookies for my family to sample? Probably, but not until he heard they were oatmeal raisin cookies (supposedly one of his most hated type of cookie). So what to do with a grouch pants that is in dire need of baked goodness? Resort to the best- My famous chunky, chewy blondies. Absolutely deelish' and positively going to satisfy my boyfriend.


The recipe is fairly simple and easy to make (well, it also helps that I've made these blondies numerous times before).


Ahh, the familiar look of these little square nuggets of gold. I don't think I'll ever get sick of these blondies. The texture and flavor combined is exactly perfect, and sure to satisfy any chewy chocolate chip cookie lover.


The only real dilemma was how to portion the amount of blondies for each party. I mean, I want to give my boyfriend all the blondies his heart desires, but at the same time I want to have enough presents to give to my family in California. Decisions, decisions.


Well, my boyfriend will just have to survive with half a batch of blondies and half a batch of chocolate chip cookies (damn, I am such a horrible girlfriend). Needless to say, my boyfriend was not so happy about this ordeal, but my family on the other hand, well they seemed to love these blondies just as much as the rest of us.

---RECIPE---

Recipe found here.

blondies - 39 square inches between 2 girls?

Being that my cousin was not used to the "new" me (as in the "baking" and "cooking" me), I absolutely had to show her my new talents. The banana cupcakes were just not doing it for me, so I needed something that I knew was a no-fail and show-off type of recipe. What better to use than my "famous" blondies? My boyfriend and his family seemed to have loved them, so I was hoping that my sweet-toothed cousin would hopefully feel the same as well. And quite honestly, no one in their right mind would dislike these gooey chunky bricks of deliciousness.


I've made these blondies numerous times before, so the recipe was basically ingrained in my head.


My fellow dough-eater and I tested out this batter and concluded that regular cookie dough was much better tasting (especially the white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookie dough). I had to reassure my-blondie-virgin that although the batter wasn't up to par, that these blondies on the other hand would be amazing.


I'm glad she took my word for it, because once she had a slice of these extraordinary blondies, she was instantly hooked. I used the typical chocolate chip, white chocolate chip, toasted walnuts, and toasted coconut to saturate the chunky blocks of cookie.


We could barely keep our paws off these little creatures that by the end of the night, an entire 1/3 portion of the 9x13 inch baking pan was finished. Yes, you heard me; two somewhat-tiny girls ate around 39 square inches of pure blondies.


Our amazing feat did not come without consequences though. We both went to bed with an uneasy stomach (my stomach was particularly unhappy, but I won't get into the gruesome details) and we both decided that a much-need gym trip was to be planned for the following day.


Good new though- I introduced my cousin not only to my newly-found baking skills, but also to these out-of-this-world blondies. She even asked me specifically for this recipe once she got home so that she could bake them for a bake sale. I absolutely love sharing my baking with others; it just makes my life complete.

---RECIPE---
Click here for my famous blondies recipe.

magic 7 layer bars - no baking talent required

So I was in one of those "I-need-to-bake-something" moods, but I didn't have the time to go all out like I typically would. I quickly tried to think of something that I could make in a jiffy, to at least satisfy this urge of mine. I ended up deliberating between a few cookie type bar recipes that I had stashed away in the ol' brain. I finally decided upon making the old fashioned "Magic Bars"... or wait, maybe they're "7 Layer Bars". To be quite honest, I'm not even sure what the differences are between the two, but I'm assuming they're for the most part interchangeable. Anyways, it didn't even matter because I technically made my "own" version of these. And that's basically overstating it, because these bars are essentially layers of crap piled one on top of another, and placed in an oven to melt together.


The first and most important layer would be the graham cracker crust. This simple yet tasty layer will be the vehicle for which the other crap will be served upon.


I used my 9x6.5 inch baking pan which I got from my mom. Okay- I actually just took it from her, but honestly it wasn't even like she was using it for anything. She said she used to use it when she was younger (a.k.a. probably predating my birth) when all she had was a small oven and this was the only pan that would fit. The reason I had my eye on this little bad boy was because it would perfectly make 1/2 the recipe of anything regarding a 9x13 inch pan (basically everything). This way I could (and currently was) making half of a recipe. I ended up keeping the full amount of graham cracker crumbs though (I mean- look at the picture closely and you'll be able to see how sparse the right side was compared to adjusted left). I need thick crust!


And now comes the real science and talent to baking...


A few handfulls of butterscotch chips, the remaining bag of white chocolate chips, a dash of walnuts, a sprinkle of shredded coconut, a drinking glass full of chocolate chips, and half a can of condensed sweetened milk. I told you baking was an art form!


After a little bath in the oven, my separate layers of ingredients melded together and created what some may call a "magic bar" or a "7 layer bar".


So how does something that is basically a bunch of random ingredients turn into a "bar"? Remember, there's no flour, sugar, butter, creaming, mixing, whipping- none of that nonsense.


I would suppose these are mostly held together by the sweetened condensed milk (which I typically think is pretty gross) along with the fact that everything basically melted on top of one another.


I mean- I'm not complaining or anything- because these sweet and gooey squares were delectable.


All I'm sayin' is that in no way shape or form am I proud of being capable of pouring chocolate chips into a baking dish. These bars, although tasty on their own, will probably never be made again by these hands (yes- these hands that can now make homemade pie crust and cream butter and sugar like a pro will not be dumbed down with these magic bars).

---RECIPE---
Recipes vary, example being here. My own "recipe" (if I can even call it that) is below.

ingredients:
1+1/2 cup graham cracker crumbs
1 stick of butter
1 cup butterscotch chips
1 cup white chocolate chips
1 cup toasted, chopped walnuts
1 cup toasted, shredded coconut
1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
14 oz sweetened condensed milk

directions:
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. (Toast nuts and coconut if desired.)
1. Melt the butter and mix it with the graham cracker crumbs. Press the mixture into the bottom of a 9 x 13 inch pan.
2. Layer remaining ingredients over crust in any order. (The way I ordered them in the list is the order I placed them). Pour the condensed milk over the layers.
3. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes. Cool. Cut into bars.

chewy chunky blondies - there's no need to be dainty for these

Crap... Valentine's Day is coming up. I already know what I'm going to give my boyfriend gift-wise, but what in the world am I going to bake for this kid? I already did the whole red velvet cake thing for his birthday, and he already got the Napoleon he has been begging me for... But seriously, what else does this picky-eater like? I think that with him, the best solution would be for me to bake something I know he already likes, rather than to try something new. He's just too set in his stubborn ways where he lives in this illusional world where it's okay to say you hate chocolate (yet devour my brownies) and that you don't like cookie dough (yet refuse to eat overbaked cookies).


If you didn't read the title, then you'd probably think I was making cookie dough batter right now, right?


Au contraire- I am baking him his beloved blondies... But this time I'd doing it right.


The previous two times I baked this recipe, I half-assed it and I broke many baking commandments along the way. First and foremost- Always toast your nuts! This goes hand in hand with toasting your coconut. (Oh, and I should mention that by half-assing it, I mean that I totally omitted these two ingredients because either I didn't have them or I just didn't want to waste precious nuts. Well my baby is getting the lavish treatment now!)


Rule #2: Get the right sized equipment! Sheesh, only now, after how many months of baking, did I finally invest in a 9x13 inch baking dish? Meanwhile, I've been using either a 9x13 pyrex or a 9x9 inch baking dish when I could have easily gone out and bought the damn thing so the recipes wouldn't have came out weird. I digress... Rule #3: Always show your baby some love (Do you get it... I'm using a heart shaped cookie cutter?).


I can proudly say that I did not break one baking commandment; and I would swear it over the baking bible if I could.


If you're like me, and if pictures are worth 1,000 words, then all you'd hear in your head is "omfg" 1,000 times over. Honestly though, tell me this blondie does not look delicious.


Somewhere along the lines of me slicing these blondies, I realized that I could no longer eat tiny cute little heart shaped pieces. No- I could not eat these and be dainty and cute at the same time... I needed thick rectangular chunks of these blondies... in my mouth... now.


Out the window went my original idea of adorable delicate blondies, and in came these thick-gooey-chewy-chocolaty-crunchy-melty-warm (yes I microwave them before I eat one... I microwave almost anything) blondies.


Don't fret- I saved the extra scraps from the few heart shaped blondies I made. To be continued...

---RECIPE---
Taken from Baking Bites.

ingredients:
2 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup butter, room temperature
1+1/2 cups brown sugar
1/2 cup sugar
2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup bittersweet/semi-sweet chocolate chips (semi-sweet)
1 cup butterscotch chips or toffee bits (replaced with white choclate chips, of course)
1 cup chopped pecans (walnuts, toasted)
1 cup sweetened shredded coconut (toasted)

directions:
1. Preheat oven to 325F. Grease a 9×13-inch baking pan.
2. In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt.
3. In a large bowl (or the bowl of a stand mixer), cream together the butter and sugars until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Beat in the eggs one at a time, waiting until each is fully incorporated to add the next, then beat in the vanilla.
4. With the mixer on low, gradually add in the flour mixture, stirring only until no streaks of flour remain. Stir in the chips, nuts and coconut by hand.
5. Spread batter into prepared pan, using a lightly greased spatula to even it out.
6. Bake for 35-40 minutes, or until a tester comes out with only a few crumbs. Cool blondies in the pan, but turn them out (and then reinvert them so the top is facing up) before slicing into 32 bars.